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25 October 2009 @ 10:20 pm
song 3: priya song  
And it's day one of my one week song-a-day challenge, huzzah!

Er, this song was written at two in the morning immediately after watching Friday’s episode of Dollhouse. No, really. Because Victor and Sierra make me all squeeful and achey inside, and apparently that equals music, now that I’m in the headspace for that. Also, apparently I learned piano for this song? I don't even know. It needed something, and the African thumb piano was not doing my bidding (not that I actually know how to play that, either).

This is actually really, spectacularly exciting, because I cannot remember the last time I wrote a song, and gave it a melody -- honestly, if not for this project, I doubt this song ever would have existed outside of a very vague passing thought of "hey, you know what would be kind of a neat idea...?"

Also, my songs are streaming at last.fm! Check it out! Tell your friends!

Priya Song
.mp3 at Mediafire
edit: sendspace; box.net
edit II: new version, feat. piano by Sarah Meholick!
guitar, vocals, lyrics, arrangement, and piano (?!?!) by Jo Robbins

light goes out
inside my head
but you wait for me
but you wait for me
sliding glass
and fingertips
wait for me
will you wait for me

stars went out
the day I arrived
stars go out
when I curl inside
will you wait for me
will you wait for me

I paint clouds
over the windows
over the windows
over my eyes
but I don’t sing
no, I don’t sing no, I don’t sing, I don’t sing
oh will you wait for me

there is no sun inside these walls
I don’t know how anything grows at all
except for you

stars went out
inside my eyes
but you wait for me
you wait for me
stars went out
inside my eyes
but you wait for me
oh, you wait you wait you wait you wait you wait
you wait for me you wait for me you wait for me you wait…

I don’t know how anything grows

stars went out
inside my eyes
but you wait for me you wait for me you wait for me…
stars went out
inside my eyes
but you wait for me
oh you wait for me

if you like what you hear, please donate!
She was mean and she had seashells in her hair!: dollhouse; victor + sierradollsome on October 26th, 2009 03:58 am (UTC)
Oh, man, that was so heartwrenchingly beautiful! I feel like you captured the mood of their dynamic and that episode and Priya so completely. Which is an impressive enough feat in fanfiction, but the fact that you could do it with sound? I am blown away! Just beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: dw | martha jones you're a starfaeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 04:16 am (UTC)
*flails* omg people I don't even know like it this is the best ever. :D :D :D THANK YOU.
She was mean and she had seashells in her hair!: dollhouse; echodollsome on October 26th, 2009 04:23 am (UTC)
ABSOLUTELY. :D I am now idly daydreaming even moreso than usual of poor Dollhouse living on long enough not to get canceled because clearly one day this needs to be set over one of the poignant montages at the end of an episode!
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: phantasm | autumn's childfaeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 04:25 am (UTC)
Heeee, now I am idly daydreaming about my little song SINGLEHANDEDLY SAVING DOLLHOUSE. Probably by becoming corporeal and beating up Fox execs or broadcasting episodes into people's brains or something. :D
She was mean and she had seashells in her hair!: dollhouse; dewitt + dominicdollsome on October 26th, 2009 04:27 am (UTC)
I am heartily, heartily in favour of this notion!! SOMETHING NEEDS TO, gosh darnit!
Sacey: Sierra and Topherdigitalviolets on October 26th, 2009 04:01 am (UTC)
Holy cow! You are amazing. This is a beautiful song.
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: lovely | summer's come and gonefaeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 03:01 pm (UTC)
:D Thank you!!
(Deleted comment)
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: phantasm | i love i love i lovefaeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 03:02 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! *flails*
Rwanderlight on October 26th, 2009 05:03 am (UTC)
I apologise for the profanity but that was seriously my first reaction. (Okay, no, my first reaction was, "Oh, cool, Jo found a song to cover that kind of relates to Dollhouse! Maybe she was mixtaping. OH WOW IT'S ACTUALLY ABOUT DOLLHOUSE AND SHE SPECIFICALLY WROTE IT -- !!!")

I am speechless, though. I've downloaded two gigs of music today in search of something to listen to and this is better than all of it. I'm not even kidding. It's mesmerising and gorgeous and emotive, and it just ... why are you not a touring musician already?! ♥!!!
Charis M. Ellisoncharismitaine on October 26th, 2009 05:56 am (UTC)
I love it.

Oh my gosh, I don't even know how to say how wonderful I think this song is.
time is all she has to kill: dw | trufax: donna is awesomelady_moriel on October 26th, 2009 06:09 am (UTC)
So yeah, this song = POSSIBLY THE BEST THING EVER. Seriously, it's awesome and I can't stop listening to it.
the sun’s been quite kind.cherise on October 26th, 2009 08:35 am (UTC)
I keep mentioning this to people who talk about Dollhouse (it was Glee, a week or two ago) and I'm trying not to watch 'til Christmas, but it seems SO AWESOME and I miss it so and ... I may make an exception. omg. Victor and Sierra. and this song is hauntingly beautiful and is lulling me to sleep ...
curlymynci: inara sparklecurlymynci on October 26th, 2009 12:29 pm (UTC)
This is really fantastic. You've captured the atmosphere of the show perfectly. Plus it's beautiful in it's own right.

You've been linked at Whedonesque, so expect an up in traffic.

The track is very quiet though - is that my sound balance or yours?
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: phantasm | glimmergrassfaeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 03:25 pm (UTC)
Eee! :D I love how the songs on Dollhouse all sounds like they could fit gorgeously together on the same mixtape, so I was aiming for a little of that sound. Glad to know it worked!

It's probably my sound balance... I'm working with my laptop mic at the moment until I can get an external one. :/
ramblin' girl: my heart fills up like a balloonbarefoottomboy on October 26th, 2009 12:54 pm (UTC)
I've never watched Dollhouse (well, I saw part of the first episode, but nothing beyond that), so I can assure you that this song absolutely stands on its own merits: it is [expletively] amazing. So gorgeous, I don't even have the words for it. Really, I could imagine this being played on the radio pretty much as is, it sounds so professional already. Consider me stunned, bowled over, and other such synonyms. :-D

(It comes out as really quiet on my laptop, too - I had to turn both the laptop and the iTunes volume controls right up to hear it. SO WORTH IT, OBVS.)

gossigossi on October 26th, 2009 01:10 pm (UTC)
Do you mind if I take this and reuse it in the Dollhouse online advertising campaign? You know, the one we're doing, not the network one. So I can't pay you.
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: angel | wesley + books = <3faeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 02:54 pm (UTC)
Blimey, ABSOLUTELY. :D Use my song for the cause? Yay! It's like we're growing a little Dollhouse Victory Garden, and I get to be pumpkins or something!
the air i breathe is stained with inkmissymeggins on October 26th, 2009 01:42 pm (UTC)
Oh my goodness. This is so beautiful. I don't even really have the words to express how lovely and haunting it is. But I've been listening to Tori Amos a lot lately because she makes my heart ache in a ridiculous way and your song, though obviously very different in style, has the same effect on me.

Thank you so much for sharing it.
Katharinasubtle__sarcasm on October 26th, 2009 03:25 pm (UTC)
Wow, that is REALLY gorgeous. Wow.
standpstandp on October 26th, 2009 03:35 pm (UTC)
Beautiful song - so rich and melancholy. I love it!
hybrid_cookiehybrid_cookie on October 26th, 2009 04:29 pm (UTC)
I love it! Seriously love it!
I've just finished the episode and listened to your song, and now I want to cry! :)
Sarah: hushburningstarsxe on October 26th, 2009 04:41 pm (UTC)
::sniffles a bit:: That was so utterly completely beautiful. I don't know how to make videos yet, but someone needs to take this song and make a Victor/Priya video RIGHT NOW.
Long live the Jossverse!!jossversejunky on October 26th, 2009 04:44 pm (UTC)
I read the lyrics first, and I really wasn't sure what everyone was going on about. I could see the theme, but I think what ties it together is how you arranged it to the music. It's chilling, but not in a bad way. In a way that it takes you away in Priya's, and subsequently, Sierra's mind. Well done all around. :-)

Edited at 2009-10-26 04:45 pm (UTC)
Janna: eliza dushku gray n blue- raelalafortunateizzi on October 26th, 2009 05:42 pm (UTC)
Eve: Victor/Sierraakarui_sekai on October 26th, 2009 05:55 pm (UTC)
Oh, this is so beautiful, and so fitting. Victor and Sierra have owned my heart since pretty much the beginning of the series, and this song is so perfect for her and for the pain and yearning she feels in this episode. I absolutely love it. You have a remarkable voice, too. I think people before me have used the word 'haunting' already, but that's the best word I've got for it.

That episode had some sort of crazy power, I swear. I couldn't do anything as amazing as this, but after I watched it (twice in a row), I thought about it all night, woke up and wrote a fanfic - the first one I've written in about nine years. As a fellow fan of the 'ship, if you have time and inclination I'd love it if you'd read it and let me know what you think! It's on ff.net and on my LiveJournal. I've already started writing a second one, too; what a powerful episode.

Now I have to check out your songs #1 and #2!
Christina: halloween costumessunlitdays on October 26th, 2009 07:16 pm (UTC)
Very pretty :) And the lyrics are a perfect match - especially considering the Dollhouse connection.
the swingtime queenshadowempress on October 26th, 2009 08:00 pm (UTC)
This is awesome. I totally adore it and have a compulsive desire to make a cute Sierra/Victor video to this song. You are also made of awesome.

I would like you permission to steal this song and add it to a set a of playlists for my great Nano project which will eventually end up on my LJ and a writing comm. Please?
possibly Claresancta_terra on October 26th, 2009 08:06 pm (UTC)
found this via Dichen Lachman's twitter! it's absolutely gorgeous, thank you for sharing!
ButMadNNW ("ButMad" for short): Oliver Livesbutmadnnw on October 26th, 2009 08:07 pm (UTC)
In case you didn't know about this, thought you'd like to know that I got here by following a tweet from Dichen Lachman! :-D http://twitter.com/Dichenlachman/status/5181329988

You're being distributed by official people. Hold your head up proud. ;-)
the love song of j. aimee prufrocke: lovely | we walked in fields of goldfaeriemaiden on October 26th, 2009 08:09 pm (UTC)

It is a good thing that no one can see me right now because DIGNITY HAS BEEN ABANDONED FOR WANTON SQUEE.
artemekiiaartemekiia on October 26th, 2009 08:16 pm (UTC)
WHICH IS AS IT SHOULD BE. You deserve it!
artemekiiaartemekiia on October 26th, 2009 08:16 pm (UTC)
I also got here via Dichen Lachman's twitter, this is incredibly gorgeous! I love your voice.
Tif: VG: ffx gippaljester on October 26th, 2009 08:17 pm (UTC)
Gorgeous. And now you've been tweeted by Dichen herself!
The One and Only Sean D. Francisluminousx on October 26th, 2009 08:18 pm (UTC)
Absolutely lovely. My heart was literally wrenched when Victor sat down and waited for Sierra, waited and waited.

I was also taken aback by Priya deciding to come back to the Dollhouse because even in that awful existence of being used and having no free will, she knew she had love. That raises the very interesting idea about just how much misery and dystopia we can suffer if we just have that one person to love and be loved by.

Your song captured that brilliantly, in my opinion. Thank you.
jeilovesyou on October 26th, 2009 08:21 pm (UTC)
I also followed Dichen Lachman's tweet here~
Beautiful song! And gosh does it ever capture the beautiful love between those two. *melts in gushy warm-fuzzy feelings*
I can not WAIT to share this with all of my Dollhouse friends! Ahhhhh!
matchlightfirematchlightfire on October 26th, 2009 08:23 pm (UTC)
Ventured over via the xchange, and I absolutely love this. Not only is it a GORGEOUS piece of music, it's also part of Jossverse. I officially love you;)
Lauratancaliel on October 26th, 2009 08:46 pm (UTC)
I also saw this on Dichen Lachman's Twitter. Hauntingly beautiful! It's so fitting for the characters and the story. Love it! :)
Lau(ren)bornofstars on October 26th, 2009 08:52 pm (UTC)
Eeeee, Jolene, this is so beautiful, and I'm so happy for you that you have all this publicity!
Lau(ren)bornofstars on October 26th, 2009 08:58 pm (UTC)
Also, you should consider putting your intro post on top so that people know why you're asking for donations. =)
time is all she has to killlady_moriel on October 26th, 2009 09:03 pm (UTC)
Second that. Most of it behind a cut so people don't have to scroll down really far, maybe. Also maybe a prominent link to it somewhere?
JHD: Fandom No Iconjhd91 on October 26th, 2009 09:32 pm (UTC)
Made my way here from dollhouse_tv. It is a very beautiful song, very haunting and haunted. And very much Priya. Thanks for sharing this with all of us!
trolleywoodqueentrollywoodqueen on October 26th, 2009 09:33 pm (UTC)
I love you Jolene...I miss you. Why won't you talk to meee?? You are still utterly fantastic by the way...I've downloaded all your songs and eagerly await more.
deansgirl4evadeansgirl4eva on October 26th, 2009 09:34 pm (UTC)
Here through Dichen Lachman's twitter as well!

Just wanted to say that it really is an awesome song, so hauntingly beautiful...great job! ^__^
squee1123squee1123 on October 26th, 2009 11:32 pm (UTC)
I am also here through Dichen Lachman's twitter and I am SO GLAD that I am because your voice is amazing.

T.ruthlessangel on October 27th, 2009 12:50 am (UTC)
Gorgeous! *also redirected from the tweet and oh so glad!* This is just beautiful. It made me cry.
cozzybobcozzybob on October 28th, 2009 11:14 am (UTC)
This was on Whedonesque!

Wow, you are a person of incredible talents... this is perfectly attuned to Priya's character. And I agree, that episode was truly moving.

Perversely, I love the fact that you wrote this at 2 am... that's when I do all my writing too. Insomniacs will rule the WORLD! xDD

(I downloaded it and plan on putting it in my player, if you don't mind? I'll pimp you! This is a fantastic song.)
cozzybobcozzybob on October 28th, 2009 11:21 am (UTC)
Since I don't see anyone else linking to it, the Whedonesque link is here: http://whedonesque.com/comments/22157

That is so awesome. ^______^
Elise: expwohding!inclementine on October 28th, 2009 08:20 pm (UTC)
Loved it! Beautiful!